Bayern Munich’s Robert Lewandowski to Real Madrid: Attack of the piranha or baseless nonsense?

It is 2022. Over three years have passed since the infamous “Lewandowski to Real Madrid” controversy was quashed by Uli Hoeness and Co. But did the saga really end? We’ve had these rumors resurface every single year. And four years and two managers later, things still haven’t changed.

Granted, Bayern Munich’s Robert Lewandowski is the world’s best player. It makes sense that every club out there wants him, especially a club of Real Madrid’s stature and history (one that has certainly been decorated by numerous referees through the years, but I digress). The last time there was any mutual attraction between the two parties, Bayern’s executive club swatted the prospect away as if it were a club from London. And now, it seems like we’re back to square one. Or are we?

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According to ESPN (who seem to have relayed information from AS, the Daily Mail of Spanish sports news), Lewandowski has supposedly made Real Madrid his target destination.

Again.

And Real Madrid reportedly views him as the ‘backup option’ in the event that a move for Erling Haaland falls through. This is Spanish tabloid reporting at its finest, and shows you the amount of painstaking work ESPN does to verify its sources.

None.

Real Madrid are hot in the pursuit of Kylian Mbappe. Provided they secure him, bringing in Haaland is going to be no mean feat, considering the competition for his signature, the price and wage tags, and the fact that they’ve already got Benzema and Mbappe playing in the same position. This could lead to them turning to their supposed backup, and there are a few problems with this line of thinking (massive understatement).

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First, Lewandowski is no backup. He is the world’s best player, and there are hundreds of clubs who dream of having him on their roster. Second, last time I checked, he seemed happy at Bayern, and Bayern seemed focused on extending him. Third, it seems highly unlikely that we’d sell one of the best players in his prime to a direct UCL rival. A club that rekindles the worst of memories and one that would almost certainly be a downgrade in terms of overall squad quality and trophy chances.

Is this AS giving us another dose of dung? Or is this Pini “Piranha” Zahavi back at work behind the scenes, leaking out bits and pieces of scandalous news that would make the club bosses uncomfortable?

Either way, it’s best to treat all this “news” with a bucket of salt. It’s likely that he isn’t going anywhere. Maybe it’s time for Oli Kahn to give Zahavi “the talk.”