Daily Schmankerl: Thiago woe in Liverpool; Manchester United keeping tabs on Borussia Dortmund star Erling Haaland; BVB wants Memphis Depay?; Bayern Munich star Joshua Kimmich’s hair is glorious; and MORE!

Thiago catching heat in the Premier League (@Carra23)

English pundit Jamie Carragher referred to former Bayern Munich midfielder Thiago Alcantara as a “liability defensively” during Liverpool’s 3-1 loss to Leicester City on Saturday.

For the midfield maestro, injuries and somewhat inconsistent play have left some Liverpool fans impatient in waiting for the Bayern Munich star to “take over”:

It is fair to note that prior to his injuries this season, Thiago was doing well under Jurgen Klopp. Liverpool, however, has hit a bit of a skid and, of course, when that happens, the media takes its gloves off in going after players.

As Bruce Willis once said in the movie Die Hard, “Welcome to the party, pal!”

United following Haaland closely (Sky Sports)

We can add Manchester United to the list of teams who might be looking to swoop in and take advantage of Borussia Dortmund should the team not qualify for the Champions League. Manchester United manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer is keeping a close eye on Erling Haaland, who he coached at Molde in Norway:

Manchester United manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer says he is following Erling Haaland’s progress and believes the Borussia Dortmund striker will have a “fantastic” career.

Haaland has developed into one of the world’s most prolific forwards having scored 39 goals in 41 appearances for Dortmund since joining from Red Bull Salzburg at the end of 2019.

Solskjaer, who coached Haaland during his time in charge of Norwegian club Molde, reportedly met with the 20-year-old before his move to Germany after United head scout Marcel Bout had watched him play against Liverpool in the Champions League last season.

Sky Sports News understood United had met Haaland’s €20m release clause at the time but could not agree on the conditions for the transfer, with the stumbling block believed to be the value of the requested buy-out option if the Norway international moved to Old Trafford.

Dortmund eyeing Depay? (Transfer Market Web)

With so many rumors floating around about Haaland and Jadon Sancho potentially leaving this summer, Borussia Dortmund might be looking at a contingency plan in the form of Olympique Lyon’s Memphis Depay:

While possibly letting out one out of Jadon Sancho and Erling Haaland, Borussia Dortmund are planning to hedge themselves by signing Dutch international winger/forward Memphis Depay. Turning 27 tomorrow, February 13, Olympique Lyonnais captain, as a reminder, got very close to join Barcelona FC, between last August and early October.

Besides, former Manchester United and PSV player, meant to part ways with French club on a free move, is still tracked by more clubs around, including AC Milan and PSG.

Nagelsmann just needed more time with Forsberg (@RaeComm)

It is sometimes easy to forget that not all players fit a coach and not all coaches fit every player. At RB Leipzig, it looks like it took Julian Nagelsmann and Emil Forsberg a bit to get aligned:

Lewy back at it (@fcbayernfan521)

I don’t know if these are real, but given his history of odd pics, they might be:

Back in the days where I was just newbie writing here, I had a running joke of finding pictures of Robert Lewandowski in crazy poses or making even more insane facial expressions. This went on for MONTHS. Every post allowed me to find a crazier pic — and he was a goldmine of great photos. Still, these in the tweet above probably would have taken the cake.

Anyway, to each his own!

Kimmich’s hair is glorious (@FCBayernEN)

A few weeks ago we covered the “controversy” over Joshua Kimmich getting a haircut at a time when the German Hairdresser Association is out of work. At the time we theorized — with this expert analysis — that Kimmich surely did not get a professional cut:

As an expert in bad hair, I can assure you that the lack of blend or fade in Joshua Kimmich’s hair was the handy work of an amateur. You might ask how I am so sure? Because — legitimately — my dad used to cut my hair occasionally in high school and when he did, I always suffered a massive “ledge.” My head went from a lot of hair on top to bald on the side — with no blend to be seen. Sorry Dad, your haircuts were terrible!

Where Kimmich’s hair had a ledge feel to it, Boateng’s looks suspiciously good. Like almost too good. Still, we’ll have to take him at his word, but as you can see in the picture on this page, Boateng has some extremely good clipper work done in the back that I would personally have NO CHANCE to complete successfully on myself.

If I was hired to be Kimmich’s defense attorney in the matter, I would present this picture as evidence:

Then, I would roll out a blown up version of Kimmich, which would cause numerous gasps and make some elderly women clutch their pearls!

Like any good Philadelphia-based lawyer, I only dabble a bit in Bird Law, but I think I could make this case.

Anyway, Kimmich looks more like a madman than ever...and I love it! Plus, it reminds me of some of my own high school haircuts! In fact, let’s make the call now: MORE BAYERN SIGNIFICANT OTHERS SHOULD CUT HAIR!

Truly, with this haircut, Kimmich knows the “ledge.” And now I’ve Erik B and Rakim stuck in my head.