Bavarian Grass Works: Bayern Munich’s Hansi Flick ready for a pain in the grass at Schalke 04

Not only has Schalke 04’s Bundesliga season been a wreck, but its home pitch is equally brutal. So much so, that Bayern Munich manager Hansi Flick is lamenting the fact that his players will have to lace up to play on such a shoddy surface.

“The pitch is not necessarily what you’d like to see in the Bundesliga,” said Flick to kicker. “But both teams have to deal with it. For my team, it’s important that we prepare ourselves for these conditions. We will reiterate that to the team.”

Photo by Dean Mouhtaropoulos/Getty Images

There is nothing...and I mean nothing...more disappointing when you are expecting some good grass and are left with sloppy pitch. Flick is no doubt worried about the health of his players because everybody knows that if they go down on some slippery grass, there could be long-term ramifications they could be dealing with the rest of their life.

If there is one thing we cannot stand at Bavarian Grass Works it is an unkempt pitch. The bare minimum any home side should offer its visitors when inviting them over for a tussle is to make sure the the grass is trimmed up and in good condition.

Anything less...would be uncivilized.

We’ll be monitoring this situation closely at Bavarian Grass Works headquarters and will pre-emptively be preparing incident reports in the event that any of Bayern Munich’s players hit the deck and eat some grass.

Good luck to the Bavarians! Hopefully you stay say safe; even if you have to utter, “Pitch please!” in your disgust with the surface.