Earlier today, the Daily Schmankerl brought you the news that Bayern Munich keeper Manuel Neuer was spotted wearing shoes not produced by his (and Bayern’s) official sponsor Adidas, an outrageous act of disrespect towards the German footwear brand. Now, an even greater scandal has emerged, a crime some in Bavaria regard as a “disaster of the highest magnitude” — Shoegate 2: Oktoberfest Boogaloo.
You might want to sit down for this and reach for the nearest Maßkrug of beer: Manuel Neuer and fellow Bayern teammate Thiago Alcantara were spotted at Oktoberfest in SNEAKERS — in complete contravention of all unwritten and written rules of the legendary event. Unfortunately, the incident appears to confirm a consistent pattern of reckless, footloose behavior exhibited by Neuer.
It is even more alarming, however, that Neuer’s continuous missteps appear to be rubbing off on other senior players, like our Spanish maestro, who has never put a foot wrong until now. The front office should take immediate steps to ensure Neuer doesn’t slip up again. Potential reeducation at a footwear-oriented boot camp in Qatar could be on the table.
At the very least, if Neuer proves recalcitrant and drags his feet, Bayern should at least require him to don the new beer and vomit-proof Adidas Oktoberfest sneakers produced in conjunction with fellow sponsor Paulaner:
Could Neuer’s foot-related slips cost him his captain’s armband? It would be a shame, in light of his great performances so far this season — no easy feat after returning from long-term injury. Still, as sole-destroying as it may seem to see Neuer donning the armband after causing others like Thiago to stumble, we still don’t know how many are truly implicated in Bayern’s biggest crisis of the century. Neuer and fellow team leaders like Joshua Kimmich, and Thomas Müller will have to find a way to strike a new balance on the team. Perhaps they can cobble together a plan before Shoegate trips them up further.