Daily Schmankerl: Kimmich wants to transfer to Barcelona, Man Utd want Arturo Vidal

Kimmich asks Iniesta to pull strings so he can transfer to Barcelona (Don Balolol)

When Joshua Kimmich met his idol Iniesta at Germany's friendly match against Spain, their conversation took an unexpected turn: after praising Iniesta, Kimmich subtly asked him to help him move to Barca. "What Iniesta thought was innocent praise suddenly turned into a formal proposal,” according to Don Balon. Of course it did. The Don was there on the pitch listening over Kimmich's shoulder. Didn’t you see him?

Manchester United will offer up to $60 million for Arturo Vidal (La Cuarta)

The Chilean tabloid La Cuarta has a hot scoop on Arturo Vidal: according to their crystal ball, Manchester United are willing to spend up to $60 million to unite Vidal with his national teammate Alexis Sanchez, who transferred to United from Arsenal earlier this year. But wait, there’s more: Antonio Conte, who coached Vidal at Juventus Turin, wants Bayern’s superfluous midfielder for Chelsea! They only have to convince Vidal to leave “the most important team in Germany.” La Cuarta is betting on United.

Christian Falk: Tuchel really wanted to coach Bayern Munich (Sport Bild)

If you are as fatigued by Thomas Tuchel stories as we are, we hope you’ll be satisfied by this Schmankerl-sized tidbit: Tuchel actually really wanted to coach Bayern Munich, but after waiting seven months just for the green light to negotiate, he finally committed to another club. An unwritten rule at Bayern is that the chairman, president, and sporting director all must be agreed on important decisions. In this case, though, Hoeness held out until the very end. On Monday last week, Jupp Heynckes told him in no uncertain terms that he would not stay a second year, but Hoeness still was searching for other candidates to Tuchel until Wednesday. He finally gave the green light, too late, when Tuchel informed the club that he had taken another offer.

Lahm says "never say never" about an eventual return to Bayern Munich (Sport Bild)

Philipp Lahm has kept careful and somewhat conspicuous distance from his former club since retiring last season. His recent comments to the Rheinische Post, however, give fans some hope that he might eventually find his way back to Säbener Straße:

The moment just wasn't right. I said at the time that a little distance from Bayern Munich wouldn't hurt. I didn’t say that I wouldn’t come back to Bayern Munich. It always comes down to what moment and: what’s it about? You should never say never.

Gladbach's Max Eberl fined for insulting Julian Nagelsmann in touchline row (ESPN)

Max Eberl lost his temper at Julian Nagelsmann at Borussia Park during 3-3 draw earlier this month and now will have to pay. The price of calling Nagelsmann a “little pisser”? €5,000. Only Eberl knows whether it was worth it.

Jürgen Klopp’s agent Marc Kosicke says “Bayern would fit” but don’t get excited (Sport Bild)

Bayern's erstwhile nemesis and Liverpool's current coach Jürgen Klopp is under contract until 2022, but fans can always dream. Klopp was the top choice as Jupp Heynckes’s successor in a Sport Bild fan survey (ahead of Nico Kovac, Ralph Hasenhüttl, Mauricio Pochettino, Luis Enrique [WTF?], Lucien Favre, and Julian Nagelsmann [just 5%!]). Klopp’s agent acknowledged good ties to Uli Hoeness, but largely dismissed the possibility of collaboration in an interview with Sport 1:

You have to admit, Bayern has often been the subject of discussion, because Jürgen knows Uli Hoeneß very well. But the right moment never came, it ever materialized. At the time, Franz Beckenbauer was still president, in 2006 he and Jürgen were together on stage as TV experts. They still get along well and are in touch. But Jürgen could definitely end his career as a coach without having coached Bayern Munich.

Asked more pointedly whether Klopp might be interested in coaching Bayern, Kosicke said,

Coaching one of the biggest clubs in Europe is anything but uninteresting. Everything has to work, it has to fit. Bayern is looking for a coach for the summer, but Jürgen still has a long contract. At the moment, Jürgen isn’t thinking about coaching any other club than the Reds.

Congratulations Sebastian Rudy!

Sebastian Rudy and his wife had their first child, David (not Don Jupp), last week. Rudy skipped Germany’s match against Spain before rejoining the team ahead of their clash with Brazil.