Report: Barcelona FC might make massive move for Bayern Munich central defender

We all love Marca. Even if you don't, you're deceiving yourself. If they're not actually reporting on the latest goings on in Catalonia, they're presenting the biggest and boldest transfer rumors possible. They're hilarious in the same way "The Room" is. And today's contribution is a whopper.

According to reports, Barcelona FC (and Real Madrid, because woo! toss them in boys!) are reportedly targeting Jerome Boateng this summer while Bayern Munich are reportedly valuing Jerome Boateng at €39M. The report further goes on to reason that Barcelona specifically have targeted Jerome Boateng for his ability to play both centerback and fullback.

Let's put the positional argument to one side for a minute and let's just focus on the financials. Is Jerome Boateng worth €39M? He's 25 years old, arguably the best German centerback in the world, and has 4 years left on his current contract. In addition, Boateng also earns €6M a season for his performances. The cost to buy out that contract would be astronomical and would in all likelihood dwarf the fee Paris Saint-Germain recently paid for David Luiz. While Barcelona do have those kinds of financial resources given they just spent a king's ransom acquiring Luiz Suarez, it's hard to see them dropping another massive expenditure on a single player in the same transfer window as the Suarez deal.

So with that in mind, let's take a look at the positional dynamic. They want him for his ability to play centerback and rightback.......

Yeah...No dice. Jerome Boateng certainly played a passable rightback for the German national team during the 2014 World Cup, but in no way shape or form should that be considered part of his club game future by anyone with half a brain. Luckily for Bayern Munich, Luis Enrique has a whole brain!

While it's certainly a tempting idea to move Jerome Boateng for nearly €40M considering the returns that can be brought in for that amount of money, it's not only unlikely in this case but I'd eat my hat if this happened. So instead let's just bask in the ludicrousness of Marca.