Striker Swap Meet Updates (with Poll)

First of all, I remain doubtful that this is going to happen. We've heard no confirmation from either Bayern Munich or Borussia Dortmund. My offer stands: if a Lewandowski-to-Bayern deal is reached this month - doesn't even have to be a signed contract, just an agreement that Bayern and Dortmund are willing to publicly confirm - I work next month for free and donate the salary to a charity of the community's choosing. I'm still confident I won't be doing that, as this story has all the hallmarks of an elaborate rumor that goes nowhere. Having said that, let's dive into the papers ...

- The Daily Mail says that incoming manager Pep Guardiola has "ordered" Bayern's board to bring in 'Dowski at any cost. Apparently, Pep has long coveted the Dortmund man and has no need for Mario Gomez. Also, apparently Pep Guardiola likes to bark orders at people. In related news, the Daily Mail has reported that Jennifer Aniston is pregnant, like, 15 times.

- Caught Offside says (citing Italian sources) that Manchester City wants to bring in Gomez if he's thrown aside by Bayern. Not a lot of detail here, just cycling rumors from various places.

- Former Bayern star Lothar Matthaus has said that Bayern will get Lewandowski at some point, though he says it could be in 2014. Uli Hoeneß weighs in on Matthaus' talk:

"If Lothar confirms this, then soon he will be the general manager at Bayern ... Matthaus has become active again in recent months. It was always with women - but now he's suddenly discussing new players at Bayern."

God, how could anyone not love Uli Hoeneß? Anyone else in favor of letting Gomez and Lewandowski walk, and just throwing Uli out there at striker?

- Finally, Mario Gomez sounds settled in an interview after this weekend's win over Schalke:

"I'm grateful to the coach because he made a brave decision to play me ... People said it would be tough coming back into the team without much match practice but for me, being right in the head is more important than being completely match fit. It's pretty remarkable, to find out I was playing on Thursday, then to win the game 4-0 and for me to score a goal."

I'm not sure how "remarkable" that is, Mario - that's pretty much what we expect you to do. But, yes, it was good to see you running hard and playing well. And Gomez could have had 2 goals if Robben had taken the chance to lay a pass off to the wide-open striker in the second half. But either way, he certainly looks ready to go when we need him.

We'll continue to track the story and keep everyone apprised. Whatever happens, Bayern has bigger fish to fry than transfer rumors for at least the next 3 months. With a big Champions League match coming up next week, the players and coaching staff will need to push the rumors aside and focus on the task at hand.

But, if you're interested, take a look at the poll below. And thanks for reading.